


In Another Life

by DrowningAmongWords



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Episode: s13e06 Tombstone, Happy Ending, M/M, Season 13 Castiel/Dean Winchester Reunion, Season 13 spoilers, follows s13 storyline, tombstone adjacent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-21
Updated: 2018-04-21
Packaged: 2019-04-26 00:06:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14389947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrowningAmongWords/pseuds/DrowningAmongWords
Summary: Jack may be young but he notices a lot more than he lets on. Especially the longing between two individuals who can't seem to use their words.“There is an ‘us’ somewhere. It’s not here. It’s not even an uttered concept right now, but the novel idea of you and me together exists. Us. It’s hard to find it in this noisy life, especially with people and clashing lifestyles obstructing the view. I find it, however - and keep finding myself in it - when our eyes meet. When the world moves a half second ahead of us, riotous and oblivious, we find each other in a glance.”





	In Another Life

“Castiel?” Jack asks, looking at the angel who was sitting glumly across from him.

“What is it Jack?”

“Do you love Dean?”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Well Sam was talking about how my mom loved me, and how some people love each other so much they get married, so I was researching the different ways people show they love another person by, and well, you and Dean do a lot of those things.”

“Jack, I don’t think we need to have this conversation.”

“But Dean loves you. I can feel it. That’s why I brought you back. I wanted him to feel better, and he was longing for you. His longing for you was so loud. It was like when he sings really loudly in the shower. It was annoying.”

Cas stared at the boy dumbfounded, “Jack, I don’t think you understand, just because someone misses someone or cares for someone doesn’t mean they love them.”

“So you don’t love Dean?”

Cas sighs, “no, I, I care for Dean a lot, but it’s just not meant to be.”

“Can I show you something?”

“What do you mean?”

“Just take my hand,” Jack says, reaching out to Cas.

Cas hesitantly takes the boy’s hand, and there is a bright light before they stumble onto the ground, in front of a blue house. 

****

“Where are we Jack?”

Jack tells him to be quiet and leads him around the side of the house, peering into one of the windows.

“We shouldn’t be doing this Jack,” Cas starts before Jack pulls him towards the window to look inside himself.

If his jaw could hit the floor, it would. 

It was him, a different version of him, and Dean. And they were watching TV, and there was a little girl in front of them on the floor, playing with a toy truck. Dean had his arm around Cas’ shoulder, and Cas had his head laying on Dean’s shoulder. 

“What is this Jack?”

“It’s one of the alternate universes where you and Dean are together. Almost all of the universes I’ve seen with you and Dean in them have you and Dean together. Come on, I’ll show you another one.”

Cas took a moment to look through the window again. They seemed happy, this alternate version of them, they were together, and had a kid, and weren’t hunters, but didn’t seem to mind. And Cas felt a longing in his heart. Before he could continue staring at one of his ‘maybes’, Jack grabbed his hand and they were brought to another world.

****

This time they were behind a tree line. 

“What are we waiting for?”

“Shh, just watch,” Jack assures, pointing at the road in front of them. 

They both heard the low, familiar rumble of the Impala tearing up the road in front of them. Before it pulled off to the side.

Cas peered at the Impala through the trees, trying to make out the people in the front seat. 

“That’s Dean, and that’s you,” Jack tells Cas, pointing to the features in the car.

“Where’s Sam?”

“He’s staying home for this hunt, don’t worry about it, just watch.”

So Cas watched and watched as the two figures pulled closer together until they were basically on top of each other.

“That’s Dean and me?”

Jack nods, smiling up at Cas, “you’re still hunters here, Sam is married to someone named Eileen, and they still hunt sometimes but they lay low for the most part. You do this a lot here, you and Dean. I make sure to leave before anything actually happens.”

Cas didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know how to feel about this. About all these other worlds where he and Dean were together when in his world, it’s probably not even crossed Dean’s mind. 

****

Before he could think of anything else, Jack touched Castiel’s arm and they were transported to a coffee shop, sitting in a booth by the window.

Cas looks around hesitantly, wondering what this universe would have in store for them. His eyes caught Dean outside, standing in front of the Impala, staring down at his phone, a neatly pressed suit on. 

“Thank you,” he hears a rough voice say from across the shop. It’s his voice.

He glances to his right and sees himself, another version of himself, picking up two coffee cups and brings them to Dean. 

Cas’ stare follows their movements. The way Dean took his coffee, and then kissed Cas on the cheek, causing him to blush. 

“You two are still hunters, you’re not an angel anymore here but you confessed your feelings for him one night, in a barn? And the next day he kissed you and told you he loved you too. And you’ve been together ever since.”

Cas frowned, he remembers that night in the barn very clearly. Thinking he was on his deathbed he laid it all out in the open. He said those three little words, ‘I love you’, and then quickly followed them with ‘I love all of you’ because of the way Dean looked at him. He thought it was a look of disgust, and that’s not how he wanted to remember Dean when he died. He wanted to remember Dean’s smile and Dean’s laugh and the way Dean’s hand felt on his shoulder. He wanted to remember the good times with Dean, and the bad times. He wanted to remember each moment that he fell a little more in love with him. 

****

“Come on, this is my favorite one,” Jack says as he takes Castiel’s hand and they are standing at the back of a large group of people, all sitting down. Castiel recognized it as a graduation ceremony.

“What is this?”

“Just watch,” Jack insists as he squints to see the stage at the front.

“Jack Novak, Bachelor’s of Arts in Sociology,” an older man says as a copy of Jack walks on stage. 

“Get ‘em kid!” Castiel hears a familiar voice and turns his head to see Dean standing in the back row with an arm around Castiel. That is, this Castiel. Who was wearing a nice suit, much nicer than his current one, and beaming up at the stage as well. Next to Castiel, Sam was jumping up and down, causing the girl beside him to swat his arm and sign for him to knock it off. Eileen loved her husband and how goofy he was but she knew how much Jack hated to be embarrassed by him.   
A few dozen more names were called.

“Kaia Nieves, Bachelor’s of Art in Art History and Native American Studies,” the Dean says as a girl with dark curly hair walks across the stage. 

“Whoop whoop!” They hear a voice farther up in the front, with the students, cheering Kaia on. It sounded faintly like Claire. 

“Claire Novak, Bachelor’s of Science in Criminal Psychology,” the Dean says as Claire walks across the stage, stopping and throwing up two “love you signs” after getting her diploma. 

“You adopted me and Claire and raised us and Kaia and Claire have been dating for ‘like forever’ when their Dean asked them how long they were together before the both of you finally caught on. And Sam and Eileen have a little girl named Jessica, I think they named her after a girlfriend of his who died? Anyways I love this version of our lives because everyone is happy. I mean, I’m happy now but I still miss my mom and you aren’t happy because Dean doesn’t love you back and Dean was very unhappy when you were gone but he’s a lot better now. Sam is really sad about Mary and so is Dean. So, we’re happy, but not this happy,” Jack says, all in one go, words jumbling together as he practically bounced in his place. 

“Jack, I’m fine, we can go back now.”

“But Castiel, don’t these universes prove that you can be together? That you two are perfect for each other?”

Cas smiles sadly at the young boy next to him. He was so young, barely six months old and he knew he wouldn’t understand even if he could explain Dean and his complicated relationship. 

“It’s just not something that’s going to happen, Jack, Dean doesn’t share those feelings, so I’m content with being his friend.”

“But you don’t know he doesn’t share those feelings.”

“I think it’s pretty obvious he doesn’t Jack.”

“You don’t understand, when you died, Dean was, he was lost. He locked himself in his room and played this tape over and over again, I could hear him crying. His longing for you was so loud and so strong I couldn’t handle it. He hated me, he blamed me for your death, so I knew that the only way to get him to like me would to bring back the person he was grieving, the person he was longing for.”

Castiel sighed, “perhaps if someone could find out his feelings in regards to us, Dean and I, then I would be willing to discuss it with him. But I can’t put myself out there and then have him hate me for it.”

Jack nodded, face set in determination. 

“There’s one more place I want to show you, then we can go home.”

****

Cas nods, letting Jack touch his hand to bring them to a dark hallway, the bunker.

“You're a human here when you lost your grace. Dean let you stay, and you had nightmares about what Metatron did to you. You couldn’t sleep. One night the dream was so bad you woke up screaming, Dean came running in with a gun, afraid someone was trying to hurt you. Well, just watch what happens,” Jack says, transporting them to the corner of Cas’ room in the bunker.

They watched as Dean tossed his gun on the nightstand next to Cas’ bed.

“Are you okay man?”

“Yes, Dean, I was just having a nightmare, I believe that is what humans call bad dreams. I am fine.”

Dean nodded, “you didn’t sound fine.”

“Trust me, Dean, I am okay.”

Dean nods and Castiel tucks himself back into his covers, head facing away from Dean. 

“Goodnight Cas,” Dean says, picking up his gun before starting for the door.

“Stay,” they hear Castiel whisper from his position on the bed, tears slowly rolling down his face.

“Cas, I got you, nightmares suck, but I’m here, I got you,” Dean says, slipping into the bed next to Cas, hesitantly pulling the blankets over himself as well. 

Jack and Castiel watch as this version of Cas move closer to Dean, turning to face him.

“Oh Cas, don’t cry, it’s okay,” Dean whispers, using a thumb to wipe the tears from his cheeks. 

“They’re so bad Dean, I don’t want to sleep, I can’t, I don’t want to dream.”

“Shh, I got you Cas, you need to sleep, just think of something nice, something happy, your favorite memory. I got you,” Dean says, one arm wrapping around Cas, pulling his body closer to Cas so the shorter man could rest his head against Dean’s chest. 

“Thank you, Dean,” Castiel whispers, smiling contently into Dean’s chest.

Jack smiles at Castiel before bringing them back to the hotel room.

***

Right when they sat back down on the couch, Sam and Dean walked in with food and beer. 

“Hey guys, get into any trouble while we were away?” Dean jokes, placing the six-pack on the table in front of the couch. 

Castiel and Jack share a knowing glance but both shake their head. 

“Hey Sam, I have a question for you, about this case, do you mind taking me to the library?” Castiel asks, knowingly giving Jack an opportunity to talk to Dean. 

“I could take you Cas,” Dean starts but Sam tells him that he’s better suited for the library.

Dean frowned but dropped down onto the couch, digging into his food. 

“Hey Dean, I have a question for you,” Jack starts, hoping not to mess this up.

“Shoot kid,” Dean says, taking a gulp of his beer. When Jack looks at him curiously he rolls his eyes, “go ahead,” he forgot that Jack’s like Castiel when he first met them, no idea what their lingo meant.

“When Cas died, I know that hurt you a lot, and Sam was telling me that you were only mad at me because you blamed me for Cas’ death,” Jack begins. 

“Where is this coming from? What’s the question?” Dean asks, shifting uncomfortably on the couch.

“Well, I sort of felt your longing. Your pain. And Sam’s pain. But your pain’s were different, Sam missed Mary more, and you were really upset about Castiel. I tried to ask Sam but he only told me that there are different kinds of loves and that I should come to you for answers.”

Dean nearly choked on the food in his mouth, “that’s all he said?”

Jack nodded, “That’s why I brought Castiel back. Because he helped my mom. And because I felt your love for him.”

“Jack, I don’t think you really know what you’re talking about,” Dean tries to say but Jack interrupts.

“But I can feel your love for different people Dean. Your love for Sam and your love for Castiel are different. You love Sam and your mom but that’s because they are your family. Castiel is your family, yes, but you love him differently.”

“For a 6-month-old you sure do act like you know a lot.”

“That’s because I do,” Jack stated a matter of factly, “Why don’t you tell Castiel about your love for him? Is it because he’s an angel? Because you think he doesn’t love you back? Because he is currently in a male vessel?”

Dean can’t help the blush creeping up his cheeks, he’s beginning to panic. This kid was a handful most of the time but he wasn’t expecting this.

“Jack, you’re right, the way I love Castiel and the way I love my mom and Sammy are different. And I don’t care that he’s an angel. Except for the fact that angels don’t have feelings so even if I wanted him to love me back, that’s an IF, I know he couldn’t so I can’t tell him, because it will only leave me upset and him confused.”

“Castiel told me not to tell you, but, I don’t know how much longer I can see you two, ‘beating around the bush’ as Sam calls it. But Dean, I can see the way he looks at you, his longing for you when he came back to Earth was so strong I could almost feel that exact same longing. I honestly don’t know why you didn’t figure this out years ago, in most other universes you have. Castiel says it just wasn’t meant to be in this universe, but I do not believe that is true. I think that if you two will talk to each other instead of using a third person such as myself or Sam then you will be able to resolve your issues a lot quicker.”

Dean let out a long groan, his mind reeling with all the information Jack just spilled to him. Cas, Cas felt the same way? Of course, Dean was scared shitless, he’s never had feelings for a dude before, he’s never felt like this about anyone before, not Cassie, not even Lisa. 

“Dean, I can assure you that nobody would really care if you were dating Castiel, he is in a male vessel, but angels do not have genders. They take on the form of whatever vessel they enter. Would you love him more if he was in a female vessel?”

“No! This Cas, he’s who, who I’ve, damn it, fallen in love with. I don’t care that he’s a dude damn it.”

******

When Castiel got outside with Sam, he gave him a knowing grin.

“Why the face Sam?” Castiel asks as they slide into the Impala and drive onto the road. 

“Jack just let me know about his little plan. I was too chicken shit to ever really try to get you two to truly talk to each other. Jack didn’t seem to mind taking up that role.”

“So you knew?”

 

Sam laughs, “yes, Cas, I know.”

Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed together, “but, I, how?”

“Cas, I know my brother better than anybody, I see the way he looks at you. How he acts every time he’s lost you. He listened to your mixtape hundreds of times when you were dead. I caught him holding onto your trench coat while sleeping a few nights. He was devastated, he didn’t want to let that piece of you go. He really thought he lost you. And when you came back, he’s the happiest I’ve seen him in a really long time. And Cas, you aren’t really good at keeping the staring to a minimum, Dean might not notice, but everyone else in the room does.”

Castiel frowns, “I suppose you are right. I don’t really need to go to the library, I just wanted to give Jack a moment to talk to Dean.”

Sam nods, “Yeah, I know.”

Sam’s phone rang then and he answered, putting him on speakerphone, “Hey Dean, what’s up?”

“Heya Sammy, do you mind swinging back to the motel? It’s important.” 

Sam glances over at Castiel, who has a dopey grin spreading across his face.

“Of course Dean, we’ll be right back,” he says before hanging up.

“That was fast.”

“About time too,” Sam says, swinging into a parking lot to turn around and drive back to the motel.

“Wait, Sam, what do I tell him? What do I do?”

Sam laughs, glancing at the scared looking angel in the passenger seat, “come on Cas, what do you think? ‘I love you’ would be a good start.”

Cas nods, hands fiddling on his lap, cheeks burning up.

When they get to the motel, Sam all but has to drag Castiel out of the Impala and to the door of their room. 

Before they get the chance to open it, the door swings open, and Jack is standing there with a dopey grin on his face, remarkably similar to Castiel’s earlier expression. 

“Hi Castiel, sorry, Dean just has something important he needs to tell you,” Jack says, moving out of the doorway to reveal a blushing Dean who had his hands shoved in his jean pockets and was staring at a particular spot on his shoe. 

“Say it, Dean,” Sam chides in, looking like he was going to burst out laughing any second. 

“Shut the hell up Sammy,” Dean mumbles.

“Dean, you don’t need to say anything, I realize that the feelings of affection I have for you are not mutual and you do not need to feel bad about not feeling the same way. I understand,” Castiel starts.

“Shut up Cas,” Dean says, “just,”

He grabs Castiel by the lapels of his stupid ugly trenchcoat and pulls him so they are inches apart. 

“Shut,”

He quickly kisses Cas, couldn’t have been more than a second.

“The”

He kisses him again, this time, taking a few seconds longer. Feeling Cas’ lips against his own.

“Hell,” 

This time Castiel grabs the back of his head and their lips press together. Dean fumbles for a second, not used to the feeling of stumble and hardened features against him. 

“Up,” Dean whispers as Castiel pulls away. 

“That’s what people do when they love each other,” Jack says, causing the pair to break apart completely. 

“Jack, why don’t you help me out at the library? Maybe we can pick you up your own suit after,” Sam suggests and Jack nods.

“Do they need their special time? Like you said you sometimes need and I shouldn’t bother you?” Jack asks innocently. 

Sam’s red face could’ve set someone on fire and Dean nearly doubled over laughing before Sam pulled Jack away and slammed the door in their faces.

“So, Cas, what were those universes like?”

“You really want to know?”

“Hell yeah man, come on,” Dean says, pulling Castiel towards the couch with him, plopping down and taking a swig of his beer.

“Well, the first one was somewhat like this. We were in a house, a beautiful house, blue with yellow trim and…”

And Dean let Castiel tell him every single detail of each universe he visited. From the dumb color of their ‘house’ to the way Dean blushed when Castiel kissed him on the cheek. He couldn’t think of a better way to spend the day than sitting close to Castiel, hands intertwined, while he rambled on and on about their lives in other universes.


End file.
